Love for a Person Who Hurt Me.

They don't give you a "Free-Out-of-Jail" card when it comes to your family.
They don't give you instructions on how to make it right.
They also don't warn you when you're running out of time.

I am just so frustrated with mine. I love them to death but they just make it so hard for me to love them. Unconditional love? That's what they call it right? My mom makes it sound like love has so many conditions. I think that she always blames me for things that happen even if it's my sister's fault. She hands me over my older sister's responsibilities. I think I am emotionally and mentally unstable right now. I can't keep up with her, I can't please her all the time as hard as I try. She does not see the things I do just to please her and everyone around me. It's hard. I slip once, a little tiny slip, and boom! "You are ungrateful," "Who do you think you are?", "I gave life to you,"...and the list goes on. If she can't see that I am the only one here who actually thinks about everybody and how everyone would feel and that I try to make our living conditions bearable for everybody then...what am I to do? What am I still doing here?

I just love her so much that it hurts me when she does not know how much pain she causes me.
It hurts me that I am always the one to blame.
It hurts me when I cannot scream at her all the feelings I have.
It hurts me when she thinks I am hiding something.
It hurts me when after all that I've done, she comes to my 13 year-old brother who does not respect her when she is angry at me.
It hurts me to have to work hard at gaining her respect.

She hurt me...She doesn't even know it.

God I love her.